The wandering soul of the dragonfly monk

I am a human version of a sponge! I have gotten to a point now that I can longer breathe that fresh air and am no longer sunkissed but rather ‘sunburnt’. Its tiring to be constantly listening to people’s whinging, whining, complaints, people gossiping, seeing people being nasty, saying mean things about each other to other people yet when it comes to them coming face to face to that person, they ‘wear’ a smile and are so lovely and pretend that everything is beautiful. Wouldn’t it save everyone hell a lot of energy, time and tears to just bloody tell the person how you feel?! (in a constructive non violent manner that is) What book is everyone reading? I clearly missed it- because from what I can see people keep on avoiding the problem yet they have the energy in the world to keep on replaying their story and each time its being replayed, it gets nasty and nastier. I have found myself recently being in a somewhat similar situation in the sense that everyon...

Divorce…Separation…what’s it like? What did you do? “A mix of cold sweats, heart beating faster than normal, twisted tummy with scared butterflies fluttering around and a feeling of yet another headache coming along when I think of divorce and separation”, and these are feelings and emotions I wrote down when I was in a “one digit” age group! At that young age, I knew exactly what I wanted and where I wanted to be in life. I knew that I was going to adopt children, I knew I was going to be very independent and that would mean working hard to challenge my INFJ tendencies and personality traits, but going through my old diaries and notebooks, I only see well written stories and articles of the situations of our world and a reminder that I didn’t need a ‘man’ to make everything complete. I was a child- how did I know all these things? Perhaps I knew something at that age that the adult me refused to acknowledge.   Well, I got married young in my early twenties an...

My uninvited, rude and disrespectful guest- Endometriosis What if, what if what we see is all we got?   Did I keep some fire hidden away in my heart to keep me fighting to each surprising day? Things have gotten real with us...oh yes it has! One day, I woke up and you were there, and you never did want to leave. You are my mystery one, my painful guilt of a regret, you are my painful dream of you and me. Our hate relationship has lasted longer than most of those 'love relationships' i have had with soulful souls.  Did I make God unhappy, is that why I have, ‘endo’? Perhaps God knew me better than anyone else and perhaps gave it to a selected few that could perhaps handle it with 'style' and continue to look for the brightness at the end of the dark tunnel of this disease. To die beneath the veins and my body wasting away to the pain that embodies this disease and once and for all to look at ‘endo’ in the eye and say, I welcome you, I thank ...